In-Class Writing Sample #2
Prompt: "Is public education in a state of emergency and in need of restructuring due to its own internal failures?"
Priscilla Laguna
Dr. Gill
ENG 2105
In-Class Writing Assignment #2
2 December 2021
“The best writing is rewriting”: 1 Draft, 0 WC Tutorials, 0 Teacher Conference
(Provocative Title) Education: An Emerging Financial Market for Investors
(Hook) Examining American school infrastructure, John Foster, a sociology professor at the University of Oregon, argues, “Our schools are, in a sense, factories in which the raw products (children) are to be shaped and fashioned into products to meet the various demands of life” (Foster 4). (Bridge) Foster references a book written by Ellwood Cubberley, a former superintendent of San Francisco’s public schools, to indicate that the present low demand for skilled workers and high demand for unskilled workers has lowered the standards of the school curriculum. (Divided thesis/stasis sentence: Opponent’s claim informed by 3 scholarly sources) Although some claim that the internal failures of public education call for the need to restructure the school hierarchy, (Rhetor’s main claim informed by 9 scholarly sources) the real cause for this dilemma in American society has to do with an economy driven by monopoly capitalism because, (Reason/Support 1) the business-like standardization of school infrastructure seeks to fulfill the selfish needs of corporate profit instead of providing quality education to students.
(Concession/Refutation) It is, indeed, true that teachers and schools socially promote students to the next grade level, whether or not these students mastered the knowledge taught in the previous school year. (Scholarly Source 1) As supporters of the business-like management of schools, Clint and Hardiman, a justice of the Arizona Supreme Court and a law student respectively, advocate in the article, “In Search of a Breakthrough: Schools Need Top-to-Bottom Transformation—Now”, that “for the past century and a half, K-12 education has been about grouping children: into grades based on their age; into schools according to their zip code; into school districts according to arbitrary and obsolete (and sometimes impenetrable) boundaries; into classes according to their perceived abilities'' (Clint and Hardiman 155). Clint and Hardiman’s analysis suggests that a school’s lack of preparation and efficiency comes from not having educational administrators with an understanding of the business model. (Refutation: Rhetor’s Main Claim + Support 1) But, implementation of philanthrocapitalism, top companies that apply the corporal management method in school reform, takes the focus away from improving student education towards fattening the companies’ money pocket. (Toulmin Warrant) An important criterion of the business world involves the expectation of quick returns, and with high reward comes great risk. (Scholarly Source 1) As experienced professionals in analyzing school curriculums, Krutka and colleagues, in “Don’t Be Evil: Should We Use Google in Schools?”, share their findings on one of the most influential technological corporations. As a philanthrocapitalist, “Google appeals to educators with well-designed technology and to cash-strapped districts with affordable prices on the front end, but they then collect and extract information from students and educators on the back end” (Krutka et al. 426). One of the reasons why Google provides so many great services and software tools for free or at a low price has to do with Google’s business strategy of selling user information, such as internet searches and preferences, to advertising companies. In addition, the COVID-19 pandemis saw a huge surge in Chromebook usage and other educational Google products, such as Google Classroom, by students and teachers alike to provide easy access to virtual classroom instruction. This creates a huge pool of information from which Google can extract from and make a profit. (Conclusion) The danger of education landing in the hands of greedy investors is no longer a science fiction horror fantasy.
(Summation: Argue that your stance on the issue is best for society) Public education in America has gone through many developmental stages from the first women’s college, desegregation of schools, and now to the business-like educational infrastructure. Recognizing the need to reexamine and improve the school curriculum to maximize the number of students graduating with the required skills to survive in the real world, the real cause for this reformation lies in the nation’s capitalistic economy. The “one size fits all” point of view in standardizing the school curriculum jeopardizes the quality of education provided for students. This method of top-down hierarchical authority does not qualify as the best fit for society. Educators find themselves powerless to have a say in the education curriculum; rather, teachers are forced to follow the commands of the people in control, the money-driven “philanthropist” businesses. The next step, after creating awareness of the situation at hand, involves dethroning these blood-sucking investors in order to save public education from further degradation.
Priscilla Laguna
ENG 2105
Dr. Gill
1 December 2021
“The best writing is rewriting”: 1 Draft, 0 Tutorials, 0 Teacher Conference
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Foster, John Bellamy. “Education and the Structural Crisis of Capital: The U.S. Case.”
Monthly Review, vol. 63, no. 3, 2011, pp. 1-20.,
https://doi.org/10.14452/mr-063-03-2011-07_3.
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Key quote: “Our schools are, in a sense, factories in which the raw products (children) are to be shaped and fashioned into products to meet the various demands of life” (Foster 4).
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(Provocative Title) Education: A New Market for Economic Investors
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(Unity/Topic Sentence) Foster argues that public education is in the need of reform because it is largely in control of America’s capitalistic economic market. (Adequate Development/Body) Investors in search of new markets to exploit have turned to education. Public schools today follow a business model where standardization and efficiency are key to providing the greatest amount of product. In the case of education, the product consists of students with the capabilities of fitting in with today’s job market. The problem with this method is that no freedom is given to those in the lower ranks of the hierarchy, such as teachers. Educators are forced to comply with the commands of the people who are in control. These people are wealthy because they know how to run a business well, but that does not mean they know what is best for the educational curriculum. The present socioeconomic distribution is very unequal; thus, instead of helping students to even out the socioeconomic distribution, they teach students in a “one size fits all approach” that makes them conform to society’s present situation. In addition, today’s job industry has low demand for skilled workers and high demand for unskilled workers; therefore, schools do not see the necessity to develop a curriculum with high standards. Foster mentions the term “value-added teaching” where teachers are evaluated and rewarded, in terms of their salary, based on students’ performance on standardized tests. This leads teachers to socially promote students by passing them to the next level, even if they did not get good grades in the class. Coming back to the corporal management method of educational infrastructure, one main cause for this is philanthrocapitalism. Billionaires and major companies invest in schools by providing services with the expectation of profiting in the future success of students. (Coherence/Conclusion) Foster opposes the argument that internal failures of the school system are causing a high rate of unsuccessful high school graduates; rather, he puts the blame on the external influences of America’s economy.
Con article:
Key quote: “All children have unique needs, talents, aspirations, and personalities, yet most schools are not
organized to effectively teach children as individuals. For the past century and a half, K-12 education has been
about grouping children: into grades based on their age; into schools according to their zip code; into school
districts according to arbitrary and obsolete (and sometimes impenetrable) boundaries; into classes according to
their perceived abilities” (Clint and Hardiman 155).
Clint Bolick is a justice on the Arizona Supreme Court and a research fellow (on leave) at the Hoover Institution.
He teaches constitutional law at the Arizona State University Sandra Day O'Connor School of Law. Kate J.
Hardiman is a Rehnquist Fellow and a law student at Georgetown University, as well as a former teacher.
Bolick, Clint, and Kate J. Hardiman. "In Search of a Breakthrough: Schools Need
Top-to-Bottom Transformation--Now." Hoover Digest, no. 2, spring 2021, pp. 154+.
Gale In Context: Opposing Viewpoints,
link.gale.com/apps/doc/A661724999/OVIC?u=los53368&sid=bookmark-OVIC&xid=f57caa57.
Accessed 1 Dec. 2021.
Pro article:
Key quote: “Google appeals to educators with well-designed technology and to cash-strapped districts with
affordable prices on the front end, but they then collect and extract information from students and educators on the
back end” (Krutka et al. 426).
Krutka, Daniel G., et al. “Don’t Be Evil: Should We Use Google in Schools?”
TechTrends, 18 Mar. 2021, pp. 421–431.,